How often do you catch yourself scrambling for something nice to say to someone, and end up settling for the low-hanging fruit of, “love your shoes!” or “your hair looks gorgeous!”?
Listen, there’s no shame in that game! Uplifting someone else is a beautiful act of kindness. But how much more meaningful would our words be if they were directed at the soul of a person, rather than what we see in front of us?
Appearance-based compliments can complicate emotions in a lot of individuals. We never know the core of a person, and how our words, no matter how well-meaning, could affect their inner-voice.
For me, the highest compliments are phrases like:
-“You’re a patient mom.”
-“I love how forgiving you are.”
-“You are a warm person to be around.”
These are factors that people have control over.
We CHOOSE how we treat others. We CHOOSE how we use our time. We CHOOSE how much we open our hearts to others.
We can’t choose how much we weigh, how clear our skin is, or the volume of our hair.
It may take time to develop the reflex of giving non-appearance-based compliments, but the more you consciously view people by their character, THIS INCLUDES YOURSELF, the easier your genuine words will flow.
To help, I’ve included my “100 Compliments that have Nothing to do with Appearance” list to give you a basic foundation to build on!
XO ASHLEY
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